What's Love Got to Do With It?

Itsy came barreling out onto the deck from inside, her bonnet askew, and the ends of her ribbon flying up over one shoulder. Running over to Lily-pop, Waldo, and Sparkie, she warned them excitedly, “Don’t go in the bedroom! Benjamin and Brighton are in there rubbing snouts again!”

“Eeewwwww!!!” all four of them said at once.

Everyone within hearing smiled indulgently. In the midst of brushing her fur, Letta looked over at them and said, “There’s nothing wrong with rubbing snouts. It can be quite fun with the right Ted.”

To which, the little ones grimaced and responded in unison, “Eeewwwww!!!”

Letta just smiled and kept brushing her fur. “Oh, I’m sure that someday you’ll all meet a special someone. And then you’ll find out just how nice rubbing snouts can be.”

“Not me!” Itsy declared.

“Not me!” squeaked Lily-pop.

“Not me neither,” said Sparkie.

“Me neither,” Waldo chimed in.

“Ah, but you’ve never been in love,” Letta told them.

“Have too!” Itsy insisted. “I love Mommola and Dad! And I love Lily-pop, too!”

“Me, too!” Lily-pop chimed in. “I love Itsy, too!”

“I love Mommola and Dad, too!” said Sparkie.

“Me, too,” said Waldo.

“We don’t rub snouts, neither,” Itsy pointed out.

“No, of course you don’t,” said Sassafras, joining the conversation. “But you do like to snuggle with Mommola and Dad and Lily-pop, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” Itsy reluctantly agreed.

“And you like to hug and kiss them sometimes, too, right?” Sassafras added.

“Yetz, that feels good,” Itsy agreed.

“Sure it does,” Sassafras said. “And how does it make you feel when someone like that who you look up to and think the world of cuddles with you, hugs you up close, and showers you with kisses all over you face and head?”

“It makes you feel comfy and cozy,” Itsy responded. “That’s what Mommola and I say. We say, ‘Don’t you feel comfy and cozy?’ And then we say, ‘Yetz!’”

“Why do you think you care if Mommola is comfy and cozy?” Sassafras asked Itsy.

“’Cause I like her to feel good,” Itsy answered.

“Because you love her?” Sassafras asked.

“Yetz,” Itsy said.

“How would you feel if she said she didn’t feel comfy and cozy,” Sassafras wanted to know.

“I would be sad,” Itsy replied.

“Because you love her, right?” asked Sassafras.

“Yetz. And ‘cause we’re bestest pals, and she makes me feel good, and so I want to make her feel good, too!” Itsy explained.

“Yes, and that’s part of what it means to love someone,” Sassafras told her.

“It is?” asked Itsy, looking somewhat puzzled.

“Yes,” replied Sassafras, as she reached over and straightened out Itsy’s bonnet. “Caring for each other is an important part of love.”

“We don’t rub snouts, though!” Itsy pointed out, resettling her bonnet more to her own tastes.

“Eeewwwww!!!” said the other three little ones, scrunching up their snouts in disgust.

“I should hope not,” Sassafras replied calmly, as Letta smirked off to one side. “That’s something only grown-ups should do with each other. Children should never do that.”

“Good,” said Itsy, looking pleased with herself, “‘cause it’s eewey.”

“Yes, I gathered that,” Sassafras noted drily.

“So love is when you want somebody to feel comfy and cozy?” Itsy asked.

“Well, as I said, caring for each other is an important part of it. But there’s more to it than that.”

“There is?” asked Itsy, scratching behind one of her ears.

“Oh, yes,” Sassafras assured her. “Much more. You love Lily-pop, don’t you?”

“Yetz!” Itsy immediately agreed, smiling at her little sister.

“And you love Itsy, don’t you, Lily-pop?” Sassafras asked her.

“Yeth,” Lily-pop answered shyly, as she put her arm around Itsy and leaned up against her.

“Why do you love Itsy?” Sassafras asked the little polar bear.

“‘Cause thhee’s my big thithter, an’ thhee taketh care of me,” Lily-pop replied quietly but clearly. Itsy put an arm around her and kissed her on the top of her head, which was something she saw her Dad do to her Mommola lots of times.

“So you trust Itsy, then?” Sassafras asked her. “You feel like she doesn’t ever want to do anything to hurt you?”

“Yeth,” Lily-pop answered, snuggling up closer to her older sister. “Thhee won’t let nobody else hurt me neither.”

“I’m big an’ strong,” Itsy asserted. “So I perteck Lily-pop and Waldo and Sparkie.”

“That’s a very loving thing to do,” Sassafras told her. “You worry about your little sister and brothers before you worry about yourself. You think of them before you think of yourself.”

“Sure, I guess,” agreed Itsy, shrugging. “They need me. Plus, it makes me feel good.”

“Yes, that’s the thing about love,” Sassafras observed. “Making people you love feel good makes you feel good.”

“Uh-huh, I like to make people feel good,” said Itsy.

“Me, too!” said the other three little ones.

“Yes, that’s one thing that Teddy bears are very good at,” Sassafras said. “But there’s more to love than just comforting and protecting others.”

“More?” Itsy asked, scratching behind her other ear.

“Of course. Love is too important to be very simple,” Sassafras told her.

“Oh,” said Itsy, looking perplexed.

“Tell me,” Sassafras requested, “when you do something really well, something you’re really proud of, don’t you like to tell Mommola and Dad and Lily-pop and everyone else you love all about it?”

“Yetz, ‘cause I like them to know how good I am,” Itsy replied.

“And you like it when they tell you about things they did that they’re proud of, too, don’t you?”

“Sure, it makes me feel all warm and happy inside when they tell me how good they feel about it,” Itsy said.

“And don’t you like to go to them when you aren’t feeling so good? So maybe they’ll understand how badly you feel, or even hold you and make you feel better about things?” Sassafras asked.

“Yetz,” Itsy said quietly. “‘Cause you don’t like to feel so bad, and they know it and make you feel better no matter what.”

“Exactly,” Sassafras agreed. “You look up to Mommola and Dad and trust them to love you no matter what you do. You know that they always have your best interests at heart, and they always give you good advice.”

“Yetz, they always know what to do when you don’t feel good or if you’re scared of something,” Itsy said.

“So doeth Itsy,” Lilly-pop piped up. “Thhee maketh you feel good, too! Even when you’re thscared.”

“I’m so glad for both of you,” Sassafras told them.

“You are?” Itsy asked.

“Yes, because when you have someone to look up to whom you trust, it’s easy for you to share how you feel with them. And the more you share with them, the more they get to know who you are, and the more they get to love you for who you are.”

“Ohh,” said Itsy, trying hard to think about what Sassafras had just said. “So if you share how you feel more, people love you more?”

“Oh, yes,” confirmed Sassafras. “Because the more they learn about you, the more they see how lovable and adorable you are. Plus, they feel honored that you trust them enough to tell them how you feel.”

“Okay, but we still don’t rub snouts!” Itsy declared again.

“Eeewwwww!!!” chimed in her Greek chorus of little ones, right on cue. Itsy smirked smugly.

“Well, no,” agreed Sassafras. “As I said, that’s for when you get bigger and you meet someone more your own age and you fall in love. That’s different.”

“Why’s that differ’nt?” Itsy wanted to know.

“Because right now the people you love are either older than you or younger than you,” Sassafras explained.

“So?”

“Well, whoever’s older knows more about things than whoever’s younger, and they go through different kinds of experiences that the younger one can’t always understand,” Sassafras said. “There are some things you can’t explain to Lily-pop even if you want to, aren’t there, just because she wouldn’t understand?”

“I guess,” Itsy acknowledged, looking at Lily-pop and smiling reassuringly.

“Well, it’s the same for Mommola and Dad with you,” Sassafras told her. “There are lots of things they know that you won’t understand until you get as old as they are.”

“I won’t never be that old!” Itsy exclaimed.

Sassafras smiled. “Maybe,” she said, “but you’re growing up every day. And when you get old enough you might find someone you care for who’s around your own age.”

“Maybe,” Itsy reluctantly conceded.

“That’s when you discover that when you grow up, love grows up, too. It changes and opens up, taking on a whole new life, like a bud that blossoms into a big, beautiful flower,” Sassafras explained.

“Like a flower?” Itsy asked, looking very puzzled again.

“Yes, your feelings bloom just like a flower, and you feel like a whole new person,” Sassafras told her. “Because now you’re seeing life through two sets of eyes instead of just one.”

“Oh,” said Itsy, beginning to look distracted. “Do you have to rub snouts to do that?”

“Eeewwwww!!!” the little ones dutifully cried out.

“No, you don’t have to,” Sassafras conceded. “But you will very likely want to.”

Just then Brighton and Benjamin stepped out onto the deck, holding paws and looking pleased with themselves.

This immediately led to a chorus of “Eeewwwww!!!” from all four of the little Teds on the deck.

“Cooties!” exclaimed Itsy, as she turned and ran from the deck, with all three of the other little ones right at her heels.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake!” Benjamin said, more confused than irritated. He looked from Brighton to Sassafras to Letta, all of whom only shrugged and smiled.

As the little ones ran out into the yard, Waldo could be heard asking Sparkie, “Did you get what Sassafras was talking about?”

“Love, I think,” Sparkie replied.

“Yeah, but what’s that got to do with, you know, rubbing snouts?” Waldo asked.

“When you get old, you lose your marbles and start wanting to do that, I think,” Sparkie guessed.

“Eeewwwww!!!” Waldo exclaimed. “I ain’t never getting old then.”

“Me, neither,” Sparkie agreed.

“We’ll see about that,” Letta commented to Sassafras, Brighton, and Benjamin, as she continued to contentedly brush her fur, making it shine.